Toasts

My favorite part of our wedding was the toasts. I have been trying my very hardest to remember them as well as I can; so that I can reminisce about them later. Needless to say, this entry is more for my benefit than for the benefit of anyone who may actually read this blog.

All of these are paraphrased (obviously, darn blasted non-photographic memory).

Bonnie: My sister's was great. She talked about how, as a young' un, I was always on the out-look for adventure. She talked about how I'd always get into trouble for climbing up to high places (counter tops, trees, random semi-perilous structures) and how after being berated for it, I would always say, "It's ok. I'm an EXPERT climber!" She then went into how Isaac and I started our relationship off rock-climbing, camping, back-backing, kayaking, and mountain-climbing. [I suppose we are a dirt-under-your-nails kind of couple, aren't we?]. She then wished us a lifetime of adventure and, "as many children and as much happiness as me and Ben!" *clink*

John: Kept his short and sweet, and congratulatory. Just like Isaac's was for his. :-)

Peter: Talked shortly about his first memories of me and Isaac when he met me, and how he knew that Isaac "chose the right guy." I love Pete.

Alicia: Started to cry almost right away, to which a Schaefer relative from the peanut gallery shouted, "It's ok, you're a Schaefer!" [Schaefers are notorious for wearing their hearts on their sleeves during such occasions]. She talked about how, when Isaac decided to become a pilot, they were all a little scared. Not only because of the danger of being a pilot, but because pilots move and uproot themselves so often, they knew it would be hard for him to make himself at home and to meet someone who could do that for him. She said that she knew I was the right girl when I called one day, and said I knew Isaac had been having a hard week, and could she please give me the recipe for his favorite dessert so I could have it ready when he came home. It was a sweet toast. I think we all got a little misty.

Madeline: Also started to tear up right away, saying immediately "Hi everyone. Well, I'm a Schaefer too...." She spoke about how whenever anyone told her how much she reminded them of Isaac, she thought it was the best compliment in the world, and her favorite compliment to receive because she looks up to Isaac so much; and has always loved that they have so much in common. She said that she has always been extremely selective of the people she surrounds herself with and keeps few friends; but that she and I bonded quickly and even if she had met me outside of my relationship to her brother, we'd still form a close friendship. She said she was glad that Isaac met someone who fit so well with his family, and toasted our love and our friendship. (We all cried)

Karl: Karl spoke about how when Isaac was a tot, he LOVED to prank people. His favorite thing was to hide out and make people worry and then hop out and scare them (or in some instances just make them mad). Then he fast-forwarded a ways. And talked about how when Isaac met me, he kept me a secret for a really long time. They didn't know he'd been dating me for a few months until he canceled a family dinner with them one night to get to take me out. Something uncharacteristic. They all got a little curious about who that girl was. A few months after that, Karl received a phone call from Isaac about that girl he'd been dating. He invited her on a date, and she (that's me) was supposed to meet him at his house first. He told her he'd be busy upstairs getting ready, but she could let herself in. [Switching to first-person for a bit here for the sake of my mental sanity]. I knocked once. No answer. I tried the door. Locked. All the while, Isaac was hiding behind a curtain giggling at how clever he was. I walked away, thinking it was pretty rude to blow a girl off like that after making me drive all that way. Nobody had ever done that to him before. (He is a catch, after all). He called his dad, not sure of what to do. His dad's first thought: "This girl has got some spunk! She might be just the thing he needs!" Then told Isaac that if he really was serious about me, a phone call wouldn't be enough and he had better make the trip to my house to explain himself. Ah, history...

Catherine (and I can't remember if this was at our wedding or rehearsal dinner): said that when Isaac was a little guy, he loved to run around. In fact, he NEEDED exercise in order to be well behaved and relaxed. She said that when he was little, they would always joke that he had better write exercise into his marriage contract. And when I started training for the Portland Marathon, she had a good feeling we were well-matched.

Grandpa Pete: Funny, sweet, and charming as always. One of my favorite wedding photos is of him toasting us. (To come later...when I have a copy of my own to share).

My dad: a toast not only to us, but to the US Marine Corps. I should ask him for a copy of it. It might need to go into a post all its own. :-) The thing I remember the most from it was, "Well, my wife told me not to recite this one. But I took that as a challenge, so here goes..."

All photos Copyright of Sarah Tunstall

5 Things we didn't get photos of (or that photos couldn't do justice)

Another wedding blog!

Things we couldn't get photos of, or that photos didn't or couldn't have done justice anyway:

1. The arch built by Isaac and his best man. I don't mean the one we stood under, I mean the first one they made. An engineered spectacle of bent and snapped bamboo and about a roll and a half of duct tape. It did not pass the Schaefer Wedding Standard. The arch that took 3 hours (and, I repeat, a roll and a half of duct tape) was quickly replaced by a beautiful square-shaped arch held together with beautiful twine. The one we actually got married under (and that was completed in about half an hour) is pictured here in the background (another thing of which we didn't think to take many pictures of). I am so proud of Isaac and his buds for it, because after all the hard work (and frustration on their part, I'm sure) it was beautiful:

2. The tuxes. Ok, well the tuxes that we spent several weeks deciding on, picking the right place to rent form, and finally getting sized for and renting. We went to Men's Wearhouse (a place whose business we are not likely to be patrons of again). We had ordered heather grey 3-button tuxes. When Isaac went to pick them up, 6 hours before the ceremony: they were black (or navy blue, we can't fully decide) 1-button tuxes. This is one time when I will say GOD BLESS Isaac's half-Irish temper. They ended up with free tuxes...even if they weren't the ones he had really wanted he and his groomsmen to wear. SIDE NOTE: So glad Isaac was ok with it in the end. He could make a brown paper bag look sexy.

Photograph by Sarah Tunstall

3. Our place cards. Suffice it to say, the package arrived, but was quickly lost and forgotten because it was signed for by someone who was neither a part of the family, or whom had a good memory. I spent a couple hundred buckaroos on those babies. But even better: the time and hard work put in by my sister in law, mama in law, and several farm school girls, who cut out all 160 little airplanes and hand-wrote the names on themselves. I don't deserve that kind of labor and attention to detail, but it sure felt special. (Can you spot the airplane hanging off the wine glass??)

Photograph by Sarah Tunstall

4. Champagne toasts. Because we have pictures of the toasts...just not of the 4 cases of champagne we purchased or all the champagne glasses we paid for. Whoops! Good news: we got a return on the champagne (and nobody complained about it missing). 

4b. Pictures of Isaac and his best man trying to get the money's worth out of the undrunk champagne after everyone went home. About 2 (shared with others) bottles in, they admitted defeat. He is an adorable tipsy man, by the way.

5. Our photographers. Because both of our photographers (Sarah Tunstall and John Givot) are two of me and Isaac's nearest and most-loved friends. I have one or two photos of them that were shot either by the other photographer or by other friends (god bless 'em). On the uphand: Sarah and John were both extremely attentive to detail and about as wonderful and artistic as we could have dreamed of our two dear friends being for a wedding.

The REAL Wedding Week Sneak Peek!

Ok, so I'll post a few pictures and anecdotes about the wedding. Not all of the (wonderful) photographer's pictures are up yet, but here's a few to start...

Dax managed to make it into our ceremony. I was really glad he could be a part of the big day. I haven't seen any of the actual ceremony photographs yet, but I am curious to see if and how he was captured during the ceremony.

Rehearsal and Rehearsal Dinner:

 

Here were are, rehearsing the process, practicing the act of getting married. 

 

Isaac's parents, Catherine and Karl, at the rehearsal.

I like this sneaky little peek, she caught my parents holding hands. So cute.

At the dinner, there were many funny (and a few slightly embarrassing) stories told about me and Isaac. Here is Catherine telling a story about Isaac when he was just a toddler. Very animated!

 

All the stories held everyone captivated and provided a lot of fun and laughter (in case you couldn't tell by all the laughing going on).

Finally, I will close with one bridal portrait. There will be more pictures and stories to come!

All photographs are copyrighted and are the property of Sarah Tunstall of Sarah Tunstall Photography. 

www.sarahtunstallphotography.com

Post Wedding Wind-Down

The wedding was great! There were just a few glitches, but mostly lots of wonderful memories, and it went by so quickly! Pictures will be up SOON! There are already some on facebook, and the photographer has been posting one or two sneak peeks on my facebook a day... I just want to make sure I get her permission to post them here before I go ahead and do so.

So many great people came, and lots of friends were missed, but there in spirit. I was oddly relaxed. Dax got out of the Hops Barn, in which he was locked up, and walked down the aisle with me (but not before walking across the back of my train with muddy paws. Oddly enough, it was more funny and memorable than irritating).

Isaac's dad was our officiant AND our caterer. The food was great! We didn't know what we would be able to serve until a few days before. The rainy season lasted so long and then it got so hot, that the best produce wasn't what we thought it would be. Still, we had: Salmon with Beurre Blanc sauce, ratatouille, and wild rice with onions and hazelnuts.

The cake was my favorite: lemon cake with lemon curd and freshly picked raspberry filling. I want the recipe. I've been craving it daily since!

The band was great! I got more compliments on the music than anything else. Everyone wants to hire them, and the family is thinking of asking them to play for a family reunion next summer. ahhh...bluegrass!

The wine went quickly: St. Josef's wine. Glad I went there. I just stopped in for a tasting the week before and loved it so much I bought several cases for the wedding. Goooood stuff.

Isaac and I danced and laughed all night. He got pret-ty drunk and fell asleep in his tux. Good times. We went to our hotel suite the next night and got to unwind and eat and sleep off our hangovers.

My favorite part of ALL were all the toasts given by family. They were all laced with memories, humor and sweet wishes.

That's all for now. Pictures in a week or so!

Tourists Vs. Travelers

After a conversation with several co-workers today, we realized that there are only two kinds of people who come to Hawaii. It's very easy to tell who belongs to which group...
Tourists:

A tourist never thinks he's a tourist. A tourist thinks he is directly related to God. A tourist sees any place he goes to visit as his play ground. The place he has chosen to visit is strictly his playground, and anything more is an abomination to him.

He will seclude himself to only a few comfortable areas, and cannot be bothered to explore anything outside of his direct comfort zone.

Since the tourist sees his destination as something that exists purely for his amusement, he has no respect for the time of anyone else (even other tourists), the feelings of anyone else, the cleanliness of anyone's space or property, or the fact that he is an outsider in another person's home.

Now, this means that a tourist will only really encounter people in some kind of "service" industry. And those people, to him, no matter how he encounters them, exist to serve him. If a tourist encountered me (a stranger) in public, and asked me a question for which I did not provide an appropriate answer, I'd probably get lots of expletives and the finger.

Then there are Travelers. I love Travelers:

The Traveler is a person with a true love for life. The traveler wants to really experience every drop of the world around him that he can fit into a single lifetime. The traveler sees every person he encounters, whether in the service industry or not, as a fellow brother in his global family. He treats just about everyone that way, too. When it comes to really experiencing a new culture, he is in it to win it.

The traveler doesn't care how dirty he gets, how messy his burger is, or whether or not he and his wife have matching aloha shirts on. He will never be rude at dinner, and will try any of the local fare offered to him, no matter how odd looking or smelly. He sees brush-ups with danger as an exhilarating opportunity that will give him great stories to tell his kids.

A traveler, though usually less financially endowed than a tourist, doesn't act like a cheap jerk. He doesn't complain about the price of rental gear, food, or transportation. He doesn't try to get freebies. He's just in it for the ride, and if he can afford the tools to enhance his experience, he probably won't think twice about it.

The traveler knows no strangers, and makes friends with just about everyone he encounters.

When Vog Changes Things

There are many things I love about kona. One, I love that EVERYONE pulls over for emergency vehicles. Aloha spirit is a team effort thing: if someone needs help everyone helps by not slowing things down.

Things I don't like: vog, vog, and vog.

When I get up for an AM shift, before the wind pulls he sulfur gas over here. Kona is beautiful. A big mountain covered in green, up against an open seascape. You can see every kind of tropical bird or plant. Truly lovely. But around 11 am the vog rolls in. Sometimes so thick it looks like a storm cloud hellbent on blocking out the sun (but trapping in heat). It changes Kona from a lush island to a fairly dark grey hill with almost no visibility.

Then, come 6 pm, it's beautiful again.

Now, it's not always like that. Some days it's clear round the clock. And sometimes it rolls in while we are sleeping.

The worst change it has made is to my health. Constant sore throat, shortness of breath, coughing stuff out.

Now. It started to spew from the volcano randomly. In the 80's. It could possibly stop all together one day.

The whole vog issue may change our minds about going through with buying a home in kona right now. On the downside, if a doctor can't help me, we'd be committed to living somewhere bad for my health. On the upside, if the vog decided to quit it's nastiness one day, I would be happy and healthy AND my home will triple in value.

Decisions decisions...

Guess it's a moot point for now til we hear from our #1, which is a short sale.

--Nat

P.S.short sale is real estate jargon for "half of all eternity."

Privacy and an update for friends

Something about having no privacy for several months can make a person re-evaluate the true value of privacy. Which is why this blog went incognito for a while, and is now by invitation only. While I want to keep everyone updated, I don't want to keep everyone updated.  So, these blog updates will be for family and close friends from now on. I'm pretty sure if you got the invite once, you can access it any time. This blog cannot be viewed by anyone not personally invited to view it.

Housing:

We've been living in company housing for several months, as finding a rental has been strangely impossible while we house hunt. Isaac's company charges us a rental rate that is very fair, but it is strange having no privacy. We have to moderate strange things, like how much space in the fridge we use, what time we use the stove to make supper, or how loud we talk at night.

The up-side is that I get a chance to actually meet some of the people I'd otherwise only hear about. The downside is that, at least on my end, it's difficult to relax, unwind, or rest. I will welcome a day of lounging in my jammies with no make-up on during a day off once we're out of here.

Home:

We are considering buying a house. I say considering because, even though we've made offers, and have  gotten several steps into the process, the sticker shock has us on the fence a little bit. Sticker shock is what it is. In a few weeks, at least, I'm sure I'll be able to say for certain whether we'll be renting a place or will have taken the plunge into home ownership. I, for one, love the whole concept of taking a piece of property and customizing it!

Work:

While I am not the right horse from whose mouth can speak details about Ike's job, I can say that he's been going nonstop for months (at least). We're checking into a resort for one night on Tuesday, and I'm hoping he can have his phone turned off so that he can fully relax. Lazing around by the pool and beach for a night would be a good way to recharge the batteries. Privacy alone would be rejuvenating!

I, too, work full time now. I work some 12 and 13-hour days. I'm working for a rental car agency. I work in sales and upgrades. I work mostly with Japanese tourists, and my Japanese is (to my surprise) actually coming along pretty well! In terms of my language skills, I can complete a transaction including all coverages, fuel options, upgrades, traffic violations, driving laws, and navigation! As well as numbers. Most of the time I can count to ten without messing up. I can even read the Kanji-written Japanese driver's licenses. But...only because I know exactly which numbers and characters to look for.

I had an altercation with another co-worker recently. A very territorial older Hawaiian woman. Who grabbed me and shoved me aside for reaching for a piece of paper (company property) that was "in her space." She is currently on a long suspension and may be permanently terminated for "exhibiting violence in the workplace" or some such thing. My managers are not allowed to tell me more than that. I was so shocked and embarrassed by her behavior that (being me, of course) I had to clock out for several hours just to stop crying enough to be able to work normally. I can feel my face turning hot red with embarrassment just talking about it.

Now, since we are short an employee, I've been covering several shifts a day some days. I never go home on time, and there is rarely a day that I have enough time to clock out for lunch or dinner. I rarely get days off, either. Though I do have today and tomorrow off. I hardly know what to do with myself! (Wait. Yes I do. Laundry. Lots and lots of laundry).

It's not necessarily a complaint though. Now that I have something besides house work to fill my time with, and don't have to find projects to keep me mentally occupied, time goes by much more quickly. I also have something of a confidence booster knowing that I can pick up the lunch tab once in a while. :-)

Wedding:

The wedding is now 8 weeks away! The bridesmaids have received their dresses. My sister sent me a picture, and upon seeing the picture, I am very very excited about them. I love the color and I LOVE that they can be worn 14 different ways, so the sisters can wear them however they want. Freedom of choice! Whoo!

My dress has 5-6 more fittings to go and is coming along nicely. I'm both excited and a little nervous about having so many eyes on me. Not at all nervous about the marriage part. I could do that over lunch in a courtroom with no regrets, to be honest. Getting RSVPs back from friends has been very encouraging. So many people that I love and can't wait to see who are traveling so far to be there for us. Gosh, I can't wait to see everyone. It's going to be so much fun!

So. There's the update. Long. Probably won't get another day off or time to update for quite a while.

Paper

Tomorrow, I get paper in the mail.

Blank, plain paper with nothing printed on it. Absolutely nothing.

And I am ecstatic!

Never in my life have I been so excited about paper!!

It took several weeks of exploring both this island and Maui in search of paper that would be practical for the printing of our wedding invitations. In a down economy, most places that would typically supply paper had liquidated their supplies. And once you liquidate a supply of anything on an island in the middle of the Pacific ocean, there's a good chance it isn't going to show up on shelves any time soon.

(Side note, that scared me into realizing that if anything catastrophic happened on the mainland, those of us in Hawaii would just be rationing things like food, medicine, and water until we ran out).

But! I found what I needed online. And dag gummit, UPS says it's going to get here on time and everything!

Which takes a weight off my shoulders and makes me feel so, so happy.

Ah, the simple things.

Crunch Time!

To all:

You may find that you get your paper invites a little late. I'm doing the best I can. Paper is in short supply on the island so I am patiently waiting for it to be shipped from Lord-knows-where, Mainland, USA.

But, once I get the ball rolling, they'll hopefully be sent with ample time for some RSVP action.

The Java Effect

I once knew a girl who worked at Starbucks. She worked there for years. She said her favorite thing about it was working the drive-through window, and this is why: Once in a while, someone would come along who decided to spread some love. For no apparent reason, they would pay in advance for the coffees for the car behind them. The person who just got free coffee from a drive-through stranger would, being so pleasantly surprised, then pay for the coffees of the car behind them. According  to this Starbucks employee, this pattern would continue for an average of 2 hours, or until there was a gap in the car line.

I think that there is a vibe similar to that Starbucks drive-through going on on this island. Everyone, and I mean everyone, has been cheerful, helpful and has gone out of their way to spread the love.

Every single person we've encountered has been friendly, welcoming, and warm. Without exception. I wish I could pay them all tribute here, but my memory isn't so good with that sort of thing.

The people who run the ship yard jumped our moving van twice today for us because it had a bad battery. They didn't have to do that. They had jobs that required them to labor in the sun all day, sweating, operating heavy machinery, with major deadlines. They weren't even working in the same area we were, they just saw that something was awry with our car and came over, already prepared with jumping cables and a toolbox.

In contrast to this, on the day the Tsunami hit while I was on Maui by myself, my car battery died in the evacuation area. When I was able to return, my car wouldn't start. Several people had jumper cables--I could see them in their truck beds!--but it took begging and pleading to get someone to take 5 minutes to help me get my car started again.

Another person who was moving things out of their container came over to help us move couches because they were too heavy for me to lift. Then Isaac helped him get his heavy things into his truck bed.

People actually let you turn out onto the highway here if there's a long line of traffic to wait for. People say "please" and "thank you" and "aloha". People invite you to cut in front of them in line at the grocery store, even if you have more stuff than they do, just because your arms are full and you look overwhelmed.

In Borders, I was looking for a book about the Big Island. I was looking with fear and trepidation, because if I had been doing something on Maui that made me come off as a tourist, well...just being a "haole" on Maui is more or less a crime worthy of punishment. But here, other locals who didn't even work in the store came over to help me pick the book they thought would be the most helpful.

In turn, I feel more patient, more inspired to practice kindness where I may normally try to be an unseen passer-by. I wonder if it's that coffee drive-through window effect. Or maybe it's something in the air. Maybe all that sulfur gas from the volcano just re-wires our brains a little bit to make us friendlier.