Aloha!

We made it! It's gorgeous. 10,000 ft mountains on one side of our house, an ocean view on the other. Wow. Just, wow.

Living out of boxes. No hangers, no dressers, no furniture, so nowhere to put anything. Not that it matters. Why spend any time indoors when I can be out in the sun?

Some time this week, though, I'll be confined to the indoors. Much to do! Must organize, paint, get furniture and arrange it, do some cleaning, stock the kitchen... it's going to be great when it's done. I may hate packing, and not be the biggest cleanign enthusiast in the world, but I actually do love homemaking. And I will make this place home if it takes all week!

Going to Oahu today for Isaac's company Christmas party in Honolulu. Should be fun!

Pictures to come...eventually. Hopefully sooner than later.

P.S. I didn't realize how great it would be here. I don't think I'm really going to miss Chinle as much as I thought I would...

So close!

We are almost done!

Boxes shipped to parents' homes for winter storage? Check.
Large quantities of boxes and bags fllled for donations to the local church thrift store? Check.
All of our boxes for the plane packed? Check!

Now, to just wrap up a few minor details and clean. Then we'll be free birds. Whew!

I should mention, that my fiance planned a magnificent surprise birthday party for me that happened last night at a friend's house. Some of our Chinle friends were there. It was really, REALLY nice of them to take the time to do that, plus put in the effort of preparing drinks and snacks. They all pitched in and got me a gift certificate to the Maui Fish House. Yum! What a nice way  to say goodbye and go. Now my only regret is that we aren't staying long enough for me to do something nice in return. :-)

300 Pounds

300 pounds of "stuff" is what my and Isaac's life is boiling down to. We have been purging just about everything: furniture, winter clothing, ski gear, snowboard gear, winter boots, winter shoes, rugs, dishes, linens, picture frames, wall art, you name it. If we can't justify bringing it to Hawaii, we aren't.

As of right now, our lives fit into 6 rubbermaid containers, that are each under 50 lbs, and two suitcases that are small enough for the overhead bins of any airplane, large or small.

It kind of makes me wonder...what was I doing with all of that stuff in the first place?

Moving to Hawaii is starting to feel very clean and Zen. Goodbye, clutter! Hello open seas, open hearts, and sunshine!

Love like a dog

A week and a half until I'm in Hawaii. Officially! 10 days!

I can't help but think about leaving Dax behind. I'm trying to find some silver lining in it.

Even as understanding as people can be, they don't forget about being left behind. But dogs! Oh, dogs. They just love their people so much that no sin is unforgivable. We get mad that they jump up on us when they see us; but it's just that they're so excited to see us, they forget their manners and just try to show us some love. Whether I leave the house for 5 minutes, 5 days, or a few months, he'll just be thankful I came back for him when I return.

If there is just one benefit to owning and caring for a dog, it's knowing that there is something in your home that loves you more unconditionally than anyone but a mother could. And knowing that every time you see them, no matter how long they've been away from you, that loyalty for you is just as strong as when you left.

I sure hope Dax loves Hawaii as much as I'm sure Isaac and I will. For as much love as he gives us, I think he really deserves a home he can enjoy. His favorite game is water fetch, so hopefully he sees all the shoreline and warm water as his own personal doggy heaven.

P vs. C

Overblogging? You bet I am! Sitting home alone for several days with a dog who has suddenly become the #1 fan of The Nap has led me to a path of boredom. And you know what boredom means: waaaay too much time with my own thoughts!

So, tonight's special is the Pros vs. Cons of moving to an island.

Pro: Warm sunny days all year long.

Con: Totally screwed if the polar ice caps melt. (Hang in there, arctic shelf!)

Pro: At least three kinds of surfing that I can think of right now.

Con: All that money I spent on snowboarding gear two years ago is laid to waste.

Pro: I will be driving a scooter!

Con: I have to navigate the world of traffic again.

Pro: Locally grown produce at my fingertips.

Con: I will have a kitchen of mayhem for a few months, trying to figure out how to use all new fruits and veggies.

Pro: Family may actually be interested in visiting!

Con: Friends and acquaintances may be too interested, and landlords in HI (as we found out yesterday) charge per week for house guests of tenants.

Pro: That means we have an excuse to set boundaries and protect our privacy.

Con: I don't want to deal with the politics of it if people take it personally.

Pro: It will be faster to get to either parents' house now than it was to drive off the Rez and through the mountains

Con: It's also about 10 times more expensive than driving.

Pro: It's Hawaii...and I can't really muster up a "con" for that.

:-)

New Direction

Well, my life is just going through waaaaay too many transitions right now for me to focus on running. My workout routine at the gym is still pretty consistent, but moving, organizing, selling, giving away items, packing.... and planning to find a home, a car and a job, all from thousands of miles away. It's kind of overwhelming!

So, I'm considering either changing the name of this blog or starting a new one. Which means I'll either have to change the name of this one or come up with a name for a new one. Any suggestions are welcome.

Right now, there are about 7 different piles of clothes in my living room. Bags for people who want specific items, boxes full of "free giveaway" items, divided by gender. Piles of things that we want to keep, but won't be able to use in Hawaii, and piles of things we know we need to part with, but don't know how to do that (selling, charity, friends?)

The saddest part about this clothing situation is that I have 6 pairs of boots. They have to go. Probably to my sister because who else has feet this small? Let it be said that I am a boot FANATIC. I relish the weather cooling off simply so that I have an excuse to wear closed toed sexy boots that zip up over the calf of my skinny jeans. I don't even care if it's not "in style" one season. I love it.

The upside? I will, after all, get to wear my Chacos on a daily basis. I am even hoping that I can find a job that allows Chacos as part of their dress code.

The waves of anxiety, fear and excitement are shifting. There has been more excitement than anything else. However, the move is still bittersweet. There is still much I love about Chinle:

The fact that the people hold fast to their traditions and you can see them everywhere. From ceremonies, to the way they support their elders, to the arts and symbolic traditions they carry on, and even traditional housing, like the Hoghaan here which is behind our house:

I'll definitely miss the intensity of a desert sunset. I've never seen a picture do it justice, and this picture is no exception:

And, as much as I thought I'd hate it, I love the wide, open, undisturbed space. I almost feel forgotten about here in Chinle, and something about that feels safe...

That doesn't mean that I love everything about Chinle. There are things I'll be happy to get away from, like sandy dust storms:

We were really fortunate to make a great group of friends in Chinle. Of course, with most of their IHS contracts, we would all part ways sooner or later, but there is some sadness that we are parting sooner. I don't think that I have ever so instantly liked an entire group of people. I'm glad I racked up some memories quickly! Camping, Colorado, Lake Powell, hiking, parties... so much fun!

There are some things about Hawaii that I am particularly excited about, even though the reality of my move there has not materialized fully:

I'll be able to have a job! Shoot, I can probably even have two jobs! Not being gainfully employed really tested my self-worth this year, and while I found that I had many abilities to be productive and contribute with a variety of gifts, I realize how much I took "the daily grind" for granted. I'll feel pretty proud of myself for bringing in a paycheck again.

Surfing! My fiance is a huge surfer. Although he may not be able to teach me himself (it's simply a test of patience to try to teach the person you're the very closest with a new skill, and I'd rather learn from an instructor with whom I'll be on my best manners). But, once I pick up the skill, Isaac has promised me my own surf board. I'm excited to add this to our already long list of outdoor hobbies. There is nothing outdoors that we don't love to do together.

Fresh produce. As in, Maui has several organic farms on it! If I'm lucky, I may get a job working for one...that's my hope right now. I know farms can be somewhat closed-off community-wise. Depending on the structure (family run, co-op, etc) I may have a hard time getting my foot into that kind of door.

"The Purge" That's what I'm calling getting rid of 99% of my personal belongings and starting fresh. It's kind of a test of my materialism. Getting rid of everything really makes you realize that there is not much in the way of material things you really need to be healthy, happy, or functional. Most of these things are for our selfish comfort. Plus, I'm hoping that I'll be spending most of my time outdoors anyway. Who needs to stock a house with a bunch of stuff if we won't even be inside most of the time? Heck, we rarely spend any time indoors here in Chinle!

Well, more thoughts to come as all of this planning and organizing pans out. And I'm sure I'll have much to share about the shock of moving to a culture that thrives on tourism. My lifestyle is about to do a 180!

Always on the go

So, since birth, I have lived...

in Colorado

California

Arizona

Colorado again

Georgia (Wyoming and Florida during summer breaks)

Colorado (again!)

Oregon

Washington

Utah

Arizona (again)

And now Hawaii.

The most interesting part of all these journeys seems to start after Georgia. That's when all of these moves became both voluntary and necessary to take my life in a direction that was interesting to me.

Isaac has said I should write about it. I dunno... I need to work on some basic improvements with grammar, mechanics, and style first. Maybe. Probably not. But maybe...

Aloha

Well, boys and girls. I'm moving to Hawaii. In December, no less...so...soon!

Turns out, the island I'm moving to has tons of running events every month, including the Maui marathon which is one of the oldest running events on the islands!

I'm not going to lie, I'm interested.

Hopefully I can hold my own in year-round heat and humidity!

Aloha!

Don't Talk to Me About Mile Twenty Three

I am officially a marathon runner. I almost didn't do it. Not that I almost did not finish, but I almost did not show up. A series of times, I almost forewent the opportunity.

I won't touch down on the series of things this past week that almost made me too exhausted to quit.

My Dad

However, the day before the marathon, my parents had plans to fly into town, to meet Isaac's family and to cheer me on. Unfortunately, that did not happen. At about 2am on Saturday, my dad had a heart attack and was in the hospital. I wanted to go home immediately to see him. After they went in and fixed a few things, I was able to talk to him. I believe his exact words were, "No, no, you get your head on straight and run that marathon."

When a Marine, who also happens to be your father, tells you something like that and leaves no room for questioning, you don't question him. You do what he tells you.

So, that's what I did. Isaac and his mom got up with me at 4:30am, and we headed to Portland. I was nervous, but more than ever during the past 6 months of training, I really felt that this was something I had to do. To make myself proud, and I especially felt it was a good time to make my dad proud.

The Runners

The thing that impressed me the most about the overall marathon, was the incredible variety of people there that I did not expect to see. Mostly, I expected to see other young, wiry, strong-hearted runners...like myself. What I saw was the elites...those people who run 26.2 miles faster than I can sprint the 100, and who were competing with one another for the prize money that they hoped would be their salary. I saw people in their 80's! I saw old couples with silver hair, holding hands, smiling in excitement that finally, after all those years of marriage, they were going to get to share this great accomplishment. I saw people in wheelchairs, whose legs were hidden or missing and whose arms were totally ripped. I saw older ladies wearing swishy pants, in groups, with silly team names (like "The Walkie Talkies") giggling and gossiping, not just at the finish line, but during the entire race! I saw two men back from Iraq, in their full army cammo suits, with their full 40-lb packs, and their BOOTS, who were going to walk the marathon in honor of friends they lost at war. I saw crippled men and women...who had hunch back shoulders, severe scoliosis, arthritis that would slow almost anyone else on earth down, and legs that were so mis-shaped, I was (wrongly) surprised to see them at the starting line. But more than surprised, I found myself in deep admiration for these people, who all overcame self-doubt to do this great event! Most fully able-bodied people say they can't do it (they can), but everyone here lacked that doubt, and went straight for the marathon! How wonderful!

Family

Although my family couldn't be there, I felt a great sense of family comradery as everyone in Isaac's family (minus his sister who is in Ohio for school) was there to cheer me on. Popping up every 5 miles or so to give me regular updates about how my dad was doing, bring me little running snacks, and shout my name! The guys acted as videographers and photographers (so we can share with my parents later). Isaac's dad went about a mile with me. Isaac jumped in and ran with me a few times too, even though the only thing he had to wear was dress shoes and jeans. I may have been tired, or faded, but I definitely felt loved.

The Race

During the first half of the race, I felt strong and alive. I suppose that is to be expected. Isaac ran with me around the half-way point. He asked me if I would do it again. I said "yeah totally! I may even do it next year!"

By the time I got to mile 19 and Isaac's dad was on the course with me, he asked how I was feeling. "Everything hurts," I said, "Everything." Did he think I would do it again, "I don't know. Everything hurts."

Up the hill to the St.John's bridge, I got a second wind. I plowed right through the hill that was making others cry and moan. There were army soldiers and several ambulances standing by, just in case, because yeah...it was that kinda hill.

By mile 23, I kept almost reaching runner's Euphoria...a state of mind and body where the runner is almost daydreaming, unaware that their body is even moving forward, but doing so mechanically, and then voila! When they snap out of it, 5 miles have gone by and they can see the finish line!

Well, my runner's euphoria kept being interrupted just as it began. I'd start to slip into that blessed state, and then a big whiff of raw sewage would waft through the air and punch me in the face. You know that smell, the kind that instantly makes you more alert than you care to be.

By mile 23 (Curse you, Mile 23!), also, I was starting to have my mental collapse. I was getting emotional, my brain was telling my body that the pain was worse than it was. The mile began to felt like 2.... I just wanted mile 23 to be over. Where was mile 24 already!? I passed some guy, who looked crazy, who said "Don't worry, kiddo. You've got less than 2 miles to the finish line!"

Less than two miles? What did he mean less than two miles? Was he lying to me. I could do serious damage if he was lying to me. I caught up to another runner. "Is it true? Less than two?" "Yeah," she huffed. "Those teenage girls on the sidelines back there turned the 24 sign around so we couldn't read it. I gave them serious hell for it." "Oh, thanks...for the hell."

Eventually, the pain almost stopped me. I pushed through! When the finish banner came into sight, there was a hoard of crowd all around me. I'm sure they were all screaming and cheering (that's what I'm told). But I had only one thing in sight: the finish line. I was deaf to all the cheering. I saw nothing but my goal. My eyes teared up, I cried, and my legs became more spry and got me through! I had done it! I finished it!

The Day After

All I can really say about today is that, although I am proud, I am in serious pain. I may have conquered 26.2 miles of my favorite city by running on foot yesterday morning, but a 4-step staircase today is a nearly impossible feat that causes great pain and requires assistance. A walk across the living room to the bathroom takes several minutes. My muscles have been torn to shreds and need some time to rebuild themselves.

In the meantime, I'm a marathoner! I ran a marathon. And nobody can ever take that accomplishment away from me.

I love you mom and dad. I'm sorry you didn't get to make it, but I'm glad you were where you needed to be in order to be well again.

2.5 days

Tomorrow I fly to Oregon. Saturday, I introduce my parents to my future in-laws. Sunday, I run the Portland Marathon!

It has been a very stressful and sad week. It may have interrupted my "mental preparation," but there's nothing I can do about that now.

A weekend in Oregon, and 26.2 miles on my feet, and I will return to Arizona a marathon runner!

Can't say I'll take on the challenge again at this point, but I'm glad I made a season in my life to challenge myself to something truly difficult, both mentally and physically. (And let me just say, if you've never taken up long distance running, you may NOT tell me that it is not mentally challenging.)

I will post next week about the marathon and I'm sure I'll have some thoughts and feelings to share about it.